CNBLUE - Try Again, Smile Again

More bigger halls and albums
Don't Lose my first intention
I never lose myself everyday
More bigger home and bling-blings we got more concentration
I never lose myself everyday

I can get pressure at times

but I am strong and I try to sing all night

I don't like same songs

and I don't like same sounds

I just love to try all night

I am gonna try again try again

Back again try it all night

I never give up forever

Try again, try again, back again time to try

I want to try to show al night

More bigger cars and concert
Don't lose my first big passion
I never lose myself everyday
More bigger world and listeners
We do more gig in many nation
I never lose myself everyday

I can get pressure at times
But I am strong and I try to sing all night
I don't like same songs
And i don't like same sounds
I just love to try all night

I am gonna try again, try again, back again
Try it all night I'll never give up forever
Try again, try again, back again time to try
I want to try to show all night

Try it all night, all night

I am gonna
Smile again, smile again
Back again, smile all night
I'll never cry forever

Smile again, smile again back again
Time to smile
I want to try to smile all night

Try again try again
Back again try it all night
I'll never give up forever

Try again try again back again
Time to try
I want to try to show all night

---

I have always loved this song, never knew that it would help me.

Introducing my very favorite band from south korea

I know that my last posts have been kinda depressing, just want to let you know, I've been feeling better. Really. 

6th of July

do you know how it feels like when you've been living your life, giving all you've got for only one goal, and suddenly you fail. You just fail, and you will never be able to reach that goal anymore. Your life crumbles down and you no longer know what to do with your life anymore. You try to be okay, you want to be okay but you can't. You wonder what are you gonna do from now, how will you move on with your life.

You had it all pictured out, you had everything perfectly planned, you knew what you were going to do 5 years from now, but now all those plans will never be realized because you just simply fail.

People tell you to dream big, and to believe it. they keep telling you your dream will come true. And so you give everything, you put all your energy and time to make sure that it will work out. People assure you that you're gonna make it. So you believe it, after all every wise man tells us to believe our dream.

When you fail, people can offer nothing but empty words of comfort, those words don't mean a thing for you. you keep on asking "why?" and you keep trying to say that everything is a lie, that you're gonna wake up and find everything is alright. But no it's not. you fail. it's as simple as that. it's not a lie nor it is a dream.
You tell people you're alright, you act as if it doesn't really effect you. So you brushed people's concern with a simple laugh.

You used to be the epitome of optimism, you tried to cheer for everyone wishing them luck and all. You used to be so sure of your success. -but now you're standing in sidelines, watching everyone but you having their success, celebrating their own victory.

I really don't know how am I supposed to sleep.
I don't think I will ever be able to wake up and face the harsh truth. I am not going to ITB.
I really don't want to know about it, I just want to run and leave everything.

have you ever felt like you lost every single positivity inside of you?
honestly, I have never  felt this sad. I have never cried this hard. A dream of mine, something I've dreamed for 6 years, been an obsession and everything I ever wanted. Now that dream is crushed and there's nothing i can do, no one I can blame but my self.

new room! world map!

I had never told you before, but in these last 4 month I didn't live in my own home, because our home was being renovated. But now, I've moved back. I gotta say I am really happy with the renovation because my room got bigger, and I get my own bathroom
So, do you remember how I used to draw on the wall of my bedroom?
remember these?

....and others went stupidly undocumented

Well, those are from my old room, As much as I love making those, I got bored with marker and I wanted to make something bigger, and more serious. My Idea was to make a big mural about a city or yeah something like that. But I ended up making this big World Map. People asked my why I made this. What's the point?
If you know me well enough, you'd know that my goal is to travel around the world. And so I made this to remind me that I need to travel around the world. To remind me that I must work hard and I can't give up.
It may sounds arrogant but I don't want my dream to remain a dream. I want it to happen and I know with enough works and prayers, Hopefully Allah SWT will make it come true for me. :D

Yeah I know that it's not neat. And there are some major mistake such as Rusia gets smaller. And I accidentally erased New Zealand haha. I'm sorry. I've planned to repair it, but I got so lazy these days
...As much as I wanted to claim it my very own work, I really need to credit my best friend, Ulia for helping me making it. Thank You So Much ULEE!

top 36

Top 36 albums I listen to

Here Comes July

July, a month which many people in my age hate, avoid, and yet curious about. July a month that will probably decide the rest of our life. July the month when the Ramadan starts. July the month that always represent sunshine and holiday. July, a start of an end, a month that has surely been waited by many people.

Tell you what, in a few days the announcement of SNMPTN will be released. I may look pretty relaxed from outside but you know my heart keeps going 'thump' 'thump' 'thump'
I had never felt this scared before, not even when I had to ride that tall roller coaster in disneyland alone. 

I wish this month will be good start of my future. May this month filled with happiness, laughter and smiles :)